Enemy Mind @ Bipolar Writer: I’m Mentally Ill, Not Contagious!

Living With Bipolar
I view my Bipolar as “riding the crazy train.” So, as Ozzie says:

“All aboard!”
(Insert crazy laughter here.)

“Fasten your seat belts, this ride hugs the curves, your seat doubles as a floatation device and objects in mirror are closer than they appear.”

Ready?

I’m mentally ill, but I’m not contagious. You think that’s a strange statement? Well, most people avoid the mentally ill as if they’ll catch what we have. As if I would spew hot molten crazy all over you and infect you somehow.

Crazy, right?

Okay, point of clarification, since I am mentally ill, I am certified to use the word “crazy.” Don’t believe me? I’ve got the papers to prove it. So, if you are too PC to live in this imperfect world or offended by the word, crazy…

Suck it!

Moving on …
I had a tough time coming up with the title for my blog post. I couldn’t call it:

@ Depressed, Bipolar, OCD, ADHD Writer, could I?

Yes, those are the tags that describe me. Interesting, right? It’s as if I stepped up to the “crazy” buffet and said:

“Only one mental illness?
Hell no!
While I’m here, you might as well load me up!”

Damn! Just my luck. I have the grab bag of mental illness. So, I have my Bag O Swag, and I can’t return it. I just have to live with it.

Anyway, I’m not here to depress you or make you feel sorry for me. I’m here to shine a light in the dark and give you some insight into my thought process. This will be done in weekly blog posts. I’ll mainly focus on Bipolar, because, let’s face it, I’d run out of room if I didn’t limit my focus.

You’ve all heard the technical definition of Bipolar. Basically, it is severe mood swings, characterized by depressive states and manic episodes. Or, as I call it, “Depths of Despair” to “King of the World.” As you can imagine, King of the World can be kinda fun…sometimes.

But, King of the World, can be dangerous too. I can do reckless and risky things because I think I’m invincible. Well, that’s how I acted back in the day when I was young. And I can say, back in the day, because I’m old! When I hear a 20-something say, back in the day… Grrrrr!

Getting back to the reckless behavior, I’m much better now, thank you. Although, I can get really agitated during my highs/mania. I make some questionable decisions, especially on Twitter. It’s kind of like drunk Tweeting. It seems like a great idea at the time, but…

For instance, here is a recent mania Tweet to a guy who got on my nerves:

“What a piece of work is man…
His douchebagery knows no bounds.”

See how I worked in a Shakespeare quote? Now, at the time, judging from his Tweets, the guy was clearly a douche, so I thought it was perfectly acceptable. But my feelings now? Not so much. Also, when I’m King of the World, frankly I can be a mean super bitch.

There are people makin Tweets that are meant to uplift and inspire. And that is wonderful. But when I’m in my mania phase, I’m like, hell no! I’m not gonna let that one slide!

Observe…

His Tweet: Write down your goals and put ‘em where you can see ‘em
each and every day. Then go make ‘em happen!

My Tweet: Or watch as they mock you.
Alas, time has made me her bitch.

Okay, pretty awful, right? He had a positive message and I crapped all over his Tweet! Well, after I disembarked from the crazy train, I looked over my past days Tweets.

“Holy shit! Did I really do all that?”

Yea, I had to make amends.

Final thoughts…

If you are thinking about doing any “impaired” Tweeting, please reconsider. The reputation you save could be your own.